Cooperative Negotiation Vs. Competitive Negotiation

A few months ago I read Negotiate, enjoy and winIt left me with a bittersweet taste in my mouth, because I thought that the author did not fully believe what he was writing, the book is a plea for collaborative negotiation, this type of negotiation is summarized as follows I win, you winAlthough I believed the story at the time, and I believed it because it was easy for me to think of negotiating for mutual benefit, it was something that suited my character very well; the only thing that made me doubt was my poor track record in negotiations, so what had I done wrong? It is true that I did not know the main techniques, but I was not so far away from them either.

Shortly thereafter, another book came out that advocated competitive negotiation, i.e. the I win, you loseI was saying that business schools that publicly defend the collaborative approach, promote among their students the competitive approach to achieve things in the real world. And I agree with this version, the main business schools publicly defend the original ideas born in Harvard, while selling as successes those negotiators who have left the rival in balls and have even publicly laughed at the loser.

Now then: what should we do, no idea, the people I see progressing professionally the most use the competitive, sometimes to extremes, there are people who only understand winning when the other side loses, it is no longer I win, you lose if not rather if you lose, I winI am referring to people who ask for anything, even if they don't even want it, and like to poke their finger in the eye of the person in front of them. It is something that also goes with the character of each one, but, we all have examples of this type of people and we know that they have not done badly, at least professionally.

I want my common sense to tell me that this way of acting cannot be maintained indefinitely, and so far it has told me so, but experience is telling me the opposite, that is, to use the competitive system, even in things that are not worth it has to lead you to clearly visualize the treatment with people in a hierarchical way, that is, there are two possibilities: I am in a position to step on your head, or you are in a position to step on my head; in this second case I have to suck up to you, I have no other choice. Again, my little common sense tells me that every day the information flows better and faster and having the sanbenito of ball-abuser will cost you in the long run, but I have not seen it yet.

I dislike both balls and bullies, and I believe in teamwork, in collaborative environments and in meshed structures (networked), non-hierarchical structures, at least at first glance, although they will always have a responsible person behind, and therefore a hierarchy, although this does not have to be visible on a day-to-day basis.

I would sometimes like to change my character and become a negotiation steamroller, and at certain times I envy them, but it's too late to change that.


Comments

3 responses to "Cooperative Negotiation Vs. Competitive Negotiation”

  1. Javier, small businesses suffer from "the competitive" which is not based on any special skill but the big fish / small fish issue.
    Although the big ones need the things of the small ones to grow, innovate, etc., and the sooner they adopt them the better, their objective is not the speed in incorporating innovation that helps them to offer new services that they can monetize or to gain customer loyalty, their objective is to make it free or almost free, humiliating the supplier.
    I sincerely believe that any serious country should outlaw business schools.

  2. When you work you can spend your time in two ways, thinking about doing your job or thinking about how to gobble up the work of others. And I find the latter exhausting, but it's true, people who dedicate themselves to the latter get better job promotion than those of us who dedicate ourselves to the former.

  3. Cooperative negotiation Vs. competitive negotiation...

    A few months ago I read Negocie, disfrute y gane, and it left me with a bittersweet taste in my mouth, because I thought that the author did not fully believe what he was writing, the book is a plea for collaborative negotiation, this type of negotiation is resolved by the...

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